This post was meant to be the last one of 2011. But it was not to be. So it instead makes it to the first of 2012.

I am happy to say that the following posts have won the Tejaswee Rao Blogging Award 2011.  In the bracket is given the category in which the post won.

1.Some thoughts on domestic violence (Domestic violence)

2.Clothing the women (The way a woman dresses)

3. Where you insult man by insulting all women (Sexist language, jokes and mindset)

4. Adjust (Street sexual harassment)

And the judges also loved

Is marriage an overrated institution? (How Important is it for an Indian woman to Get-Married and Stay-Married?)

You can see the complete list of winners here.  

Perhaps I need not have put up this post as I have put up the badges on the relevant posts and thanked IHM and her team at her page. But I want to say the metaphorical “two words” about these posts of mine. And I hope those to whom it is addressed read this.

When my post on domestic violence came up I was laughed at. “What do YOU know about domestic violence?” I was asked condescendingly. Well actually nothing at all, at a personal level. But I happen to have eyes and ears and something called empathy, at my disposal. And yeah, that is me who you see having that last laugh.

Coming to the third post, (Where you insult man by insulting all womenthere was a comment that said, ‘these are standard proverbs and language.’ and that questioning them was “overkill” ‘Standard’? What ‘standard’ would that be? Set when? By whom? For whom? Why should those ‘standards’ (if ever it had been ‘standard’) apply in the here and now? Why should they not be questioned? Once upon a time, killing humans as sacrifice was a ‘standard’ for worship; women committing sati was also the ‘standard’ at one point of time. In fact just a few decades back in my youth, NO ONE even thought the girls who were harassed on roads had any rights, they were blamed for bringing the harassment upon themselves. That had been the ‘standard’. So which unchangeable ‘standards’ in proverbs and language cast in stone (even stones wear out) are we talking about?

The last post, the one on marriage has generated enough heat. Strangely enough, the questions flung at me have the answers in the post itself. So I have to (sadly) conclude that those who asked/ask them have NOT read the post. The topic of the post is whether marriage is an overrated institution. And I say without any compunction, it most definitely is overrated. My opinion of course.

An interesting observation had been by someone who told me that since I have a happy marriage going I should not speak against marriage. By the same token is it that all the unhappily married are allowed to speak against it? So the happily married ones force their children to marry and the unhappily married stop them from marrying? Is that how it is? The difference between objective and subjective reasoning seems to be a tough thing to master for most people.

Another interesting comment revealed how peer pressure makes men feel slighted when they make adjustments in marriage (and is upheld by his friends, wah re wah, what solidarity), which adjustments they expect from a wife as a matter of right.

I will wind up with a hilarious comment to the post that told me that I wouldn’t have been in the world and have family time, get educated and enjoy good upbringing without a marriage happening in the first place. But it never seemed to have crossed the dear chap as to why I would ever need family time, good upbringing or education when I don’t even exist!

My thanks to you IHM and the judges, who have all put in some real hard work to make TRBA 2011 possible And now we move on to an e-book. Yay! Things really look good for 2012.

By the way, don’t forget to submit posts for the TRBA 2012 here.

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