It’s a foregone conclusion.
What is?
Your topic for today. It’s Luci.
Yes, L is reserved for Luci, that is if D has not been about her, The Dog.
So predictable and boring.
Luci is not boring.
When there are so many topics to choose from…
Like?
Leprechauns, (at)loggerheads, luminous, love, locks.. and of course ‘like’ too.
Seriously? You think those would be more interesting than Luci?

Here are a few of the updates about Luci from my Facebook page, posted under the hashtag #lucitales. You be the judge.

20 April 2012
Yesterday Luci chose to run away with Imperial Blandings – An Omnibus, by P.G.Wodehouse from among the many books lying around. The L&M said she probably has the same taste in books as her Mumma. No pun intended.

14 Jan 2014
Luci: whine..whimper..whine..whimper
Me: tap..tapt.tap..tappety tap
Luci: whine..whimper..whine..whimper
Me: tap teppety teppety tap tap… (pauses in typing) What??!
Luci: (looks beneath the cot) whine.. whine.. whimper..
Me: Oh okay!!!! Goes, gets the broom and sweeps out whatever it is she has lost
Luci: silent, waiting patiently
Me: What! That’s my slipper!!!!!!!! Grr… You can’t have it, NO!
Luci: sulks

9 March 2015
Me to Luci: (singing) Ek nadi se maine poochha itla ke chal di kahan?
Luci: (forehead wrinkled in worry, thinking) Good Lord, am I supposed to know the answer to this one?!! I hope not (wags tail really fast to cover up the fact that she is clueless about the whole thing)

21 Dec 2017
Luci barking because someone is at the gate next door.
L&M: (exasperated with the sound pollution and the fact that it is not even our house) We’ll donate Luci to the Residents’ Association. They can remove the present security guard and instead appoint her.

04 Jan 2018
Me to the L&M: Look, a cuuuuute kitten on the wall. Omg, isn’t it so very cuuuuute! Awww…. just look at the cuuuuute thing.
Luci Shail immediately alert, comes over to see who could be cuter than her, sees the kitten and quickly switches to her Jhansi Ki Rani warrior avatar. ‘My kingdom! Get out! Get out! GET OUT!!!!’ she shouts at the terrified kitten who flees the field before a battle can happen.
Now ‘cuuute’ is cat/kitten in Luci’s dictionary!

22 Feb 2018
I hear someone at the gate a good twenty seconds before Luci and announce the fact. THEN, Luci gets up and gives her intruder-alert bark. I feel Luci and I should exchange places: Luci at the computer, blogging and I bow-wow-ing (informing) on strangers at the gate. But I feel Luci is not too sold on the idea

22 Feb 2018
Me: Luci, why do you trouble Dad so much when he bathes you? You are such a good girl with me.
Luci: Umm… Dad never talks to me other than to say sit, stand, turn around, sit, sit and some more of sit. And he doesn’t sing silly made-up songs about me.
Me: Point, Luci

15 March 2018
In my dream last night, a lion bit Luci Shail’s tail and pulled, intending to make her his meal. Livid, I yelled at the lion to leave her alone, like NOW! Scared, the lion ran away to hide. Phew, saved!

31 March 2018
Luci Shail is standing at the bedroom door preventing me from closing it. I ask her to step in since I need to close the door. But she is undecided. I switch on the fan to indicate it’s a long haul, I am staying put. She doesn’t budge. I pick up the AC remote and in a jiffy her decision is made. She steps smartly inside and plonks down.

19 April 2018
L&M: Do you know why the birds keep flying into our house?
Me: Why?
L&M: They think this here is a photo studio and so can get their pictures taken. As soon as one is here you are running around trying to click it.
Me: Lololol
L&M: But, the other birds warn the one on its way, ‘Beware of the bhadrakali dog living there, don’t fly too low!’
Me: Lolololol
Luci though is not amused.

07 May 2018
Whenever neighborhood cats and I cross paths, they stop and stare at me as if they have seen a ghost. “Omg she’s that whatchamacallit dog’s mom!” And then they vamoose!

01 Nov 2018
Man on the street calling out in his singsong voice: Umbrellas for repair? Do you have umbrellas for repair?
Dogs of the neighborhood and Luci in unison: BOWRROWWROWWROWROWROWROW!
The message is LOUD and clear: No umbrellas for repair.

17 Jan 2019
Courier: (over the phone) I have reached the post office. Where exactly is the house in relation to it?
Me: (Trying to talk louder than Luci ‘s barks) Take the turning to the right…
Courier: What?
Me: TO THE RIGHT…
Courier: Never mind. I can hear the dog. I’ll be over.

11 March 2019
Me to Second Born: Luci, take Second Born for a walk!
Me to Luci: Here, come and get your treat, Second Born!

27 Oct 2019
The neighbor’s dog sees me on the terrace, points his snout towards the sky and barks. Woof, woof, woof, woof, woof. Yup, I am pretty popular around here as Luci ‘s mom.

Well?

© Shail Mohan 2020