Today, a friend of mine was relating how she had dislocated her right wrist a couple of years back. She showed, by moving her wrist, how she still had only limited mobility in her right wrist compared to the left one.

That came as quite a surprise to me.

You see, she is not just an artist, but an art teacher too and was just then in the middle of an art lesson, demonstrating to us the intricacies of drawing a peacock feather in all its glorious colours.

Had it been bad? Was her ability to paint been affected when it happened? How had she overcome it? I remember the time when my artist son, the Second Born, had fractured his wrist. I had been worried for him at the time. Would it affect his ability to draw? Had she too been plagued by such doubts? Questions played in my mind and I waited with bated breathe for her to continue.

You see, I love to hear other people talk of their life experiences. Stories of all kinds, whether they be of grit, are inspirational, talk of triumph and/or loss, happy stories, sad stories, funny stories, old stories, modern stories, once in a lifetime stories or mundane everyday stories… you name it, they all interest me.

Every kind of story, I feel, has something to tell, some buried nugget of information – different for each listener – to learn from, or store away for future reference. (Let me clarify though that I am not interested in the stories of the greatness of God or the spewing of rabid hatred for the ‘other’ of any sort in a society and prefer to walk away rather than listen to them)

So yeah, I was all ears to hear more of HER story. But even as she was talking, a third person shut her up by abruptly interrupting her. ‘Enough! No need to delve into the past and wallow in negativity. It is not good for you’ or something equally ridiculous was what was said. My jaw didn’t drop to the ground because this was not the first time I was witnessing this kind of interruption and shutting down of another’s voice by the same person, and it set me thinking.

• In which universe, as they say, is telling others of your personal experience (in this case a simple thing as the dislocation of a wrist!) classified as ‘negative’? What kind of absurd theory is this?
• What right has a third person to stop anyone from talking of their experience if they so wished? Experiences of any kind, not just a dislocated wrist, mind you.
• What about the interests of others who did indeed want to listen to stories, of a dislocated wrist included. Didn’t that count?
• Are people with ‘negative’ stories (not just a dislocated wrist but really negative ones) in their life supposed to shut up and never talk of their experiences? Don’t they too have the right to talk and be heard?
• Who decides which stories are negative and which are not? Random people without a clue? What are the criteria, the guidelines, and who has the guidebook?
• Is there a law against the telling of so called negative stories in India? Doesn’t our constitution guarantee equal rights to everyone to tell whatever story they like, barring those inciting violence?
• How does effectively shutting up the person who was talking and then saying ‘sorry’ to the person who objected (me) solve anything? The apology is owed to the speaker, not to to me.

I can go on. But I am kind of done for the day. I have had a long one today. My head was teeming with questions on the way home. I don’t know where they have all gone and hidden themselves now. It’s almost my bedtime. Maybe that’s why they are hiding. But rest assured, I will update this post when they come back. No Siree, I am not done. I have had enough of THIS nonsense.

Here’s a question: Is it the shifting of limelight away from them that makes people interrupt rudely with absurd theories? Is it a way of saying, Stop talking because everyone is looking at you. I want them to look at me! I am no psychologist, but it is worth thinking about, right?

©️ Shail Mohan 2024

Note: If anyone has objection to what I have written here, please refer my bio and what it says.