Most think of introverts as shy people who don’t like to talk. Nope. Not true at all. Introverts do talk, but they need a reason and the topic should interest them enough too. If not they just shut up and remain quiet. How do I know? I know because I am one of them. Here’s how it goes. If you and I got talking there’s a good chance that at times I might be forgiven for chewing your ear off. On the other hand, there’ll be occasions when you might be excused for thinking I have swallowed my tongue.
When I first came across the 10 Myths About Introverts, I was thrilled to bits. It fit me, it fit me, AND HOW! Take the third one in the list (all of them fit!) for example. Myth #3 – Introverts are rude, it says. If I could have a rupee for each time someone thought I was rude when in reality I was anything but (not even in my wildest dreams), I’d be a millionaire by now. No, a billionaire. Truth. No kidding.
So what’s the truth behind this myth? Here it is right from the horse’s mouth, umm keyboard:
Introverts often don’t see a reason for beating around the bush with social pleasantries. They want everyone to just be real and honest. (link)
You can say that again. And then again. How I wish all were real and honest. The worst part in this? Your own real and honest (NOT blunt, mind you, but purely real and honest) version is not acceptable to the world, it seems. People have become so used to sugarcoated lies that what’s real and honest grates on their nerves that they shun it. Sigh. There’s more:
Unfortunately, this is not acceptable in most settings, so Introverts can feel a lot of pressure to fit in, which they find exhausting.
Tell me about about ‘finding it all exhausting’. The exhaustion is so real that one needs plenty of me-time to get back to the original refreshed state.
Another one I like is the response to Myth #7 – Introverts are weird. Yeah, like really? The truth of the matter:
Introverts are often individualists. They don’t follow the crowd. They’d prefer to be valued for their novel ways of living. They think for themselves and because of that, they often challenge the norm. They don’t make most decisions based on what is popular or trendy. (link)
No following the crowds. Yes! Years back mother took me to the goldsmith to have a Palaykka necklace made for my wedding. The traditional Palaykka necklace has green and magenta stones in it, but I requested the goldsmith make it with a green and white combination of stones for me. He was disdainful of my choice. Palaykka was ALWAYS made with green and magenta stones. It wouldn’t look good, he told me. White was going to make it a disaster to behold.
The older women sided with him. That’s how it has always been made, they said. White won’t give it the look! But I stuck to my guns. It would look good, I said, and anyway I’d be the one wearing it. Reluctantly everyone agreed. Every time I have worn it since people have commented on its uniqueness. We have never seen a Palykka necklace in green and white, they tell me. This anecdote is NOT just about a necklace, but reflects my whole philosophy of life. Following the crowd is not an option I consider, nor what’s popular or trendy.
My favorite line: THEY THINK FOR THEMSELVES. Yes, yes, yessss, we do! You can’t spoon-feed us, can’t indoctrinate us. Personally, I’ll analyze whatever anyone tells me threadbare and arrive at my own conclusion taking into account other information available.
What’s more, I love people who can think for themselves. I am really sorry to say this, but interacting with those who don’t do their own thinking gives me terrible headaches. And that includes people with certain political leanings. Less said about them the better. I can already feel a headache coming on.
©Shail Mohan 2018