I wake up late. It is Sunday after all. As I open the bedroom door, my thoughts are solely about the cuppa that will shortly be in my hands. Yup, without imbibing the elixir that uplifts, my day can never ever have a start. I am listless and hopeless too, literally balking at the day ahead until and unless the system is appeased with the brew that cheers, chai.
As soon as I step outside the bedroom, Luci who has been waiting patiently jumps up to greet me. That peps me up for a while. It is amazing how dogs make you feel by their enthusiasm on seeing you. My face lights up in joy, and I chirrup to her, my lethargy forgotten for the moment. Strange indeed are the ways of showing affection. In Bollywood they break into a song and do calisthenics. Luci on the other hand shows hers by jumping up and trying to topple me over. If she can, she packs in a few nips too.
I make it half way down the stairs and then sit down to have a serious cuddling session with Luci, who is still excited about the fact that I have survived the gruelling sleep session at night and am back with her in one piece. That is when I look down and notice that the sitting room looks all spruced up. Wow, someone’s been doing some cleaning up. No prizes though for guessing who has been at it with broom and duster. Obviously it is not I because I have only just woken up. It certainly is not Luci either. Her job is to litter the room as much as possible and thus keep her ‘slaves’ in shape, not that it is helping any in my case.
Anyways, that leaves the L & M as the only choice. It is indeed he who has been up, with the lark, and been quite the busybody. There is a stack of ironed shirts and trousers on the dining chair to prove how industrious he has been. Luci’s bowl has milk in it though she herself has forborne to touch it. Oh man! I think to myself, the guy is giving me a complex (Sunday after Sunday) and me a homemaker too. Why can’t he emulate others and laze on a Sunday and thereby let me laze too?
What I need is an excuse, a nice shiny, smooth, solidly strong and plausible excuse to not only get myself out of work but also feel good about it. Tall order, I know. Tea, tea! scream my cells. No use attempting thought before downing the cuppa.
“Good morning! Good morning!” says the Colonel on espying me dragging myself down the stairs with a prancing Luci in tow. She rushes to Dad wagging her tail furiously (where do Labradors get the energy for non-stop tail wagging?) as if to say, ‘Look, look! She is here safe and sound. The Night Monsters didn’t gobble her up as I had feared. Phew!’
“Chai?” I ask him.
“Of course, chai!” says the L & M who has already downed one and is now looking for his second innings.
Chai is made and had. I wait patiently for it to course through my system and throw up that much needed excuse for shirking work today. Without fail (what did I tell you?) chai comes up with an infallible and safe one. It will suffice for today.
“Darling!” I say in dulcet tones, “I have something to write today. Can we get biriyani from outside for lunch?”
“Why not?!” says the L & M. “I will go at around 11-30 a.m. and get it.”
I sigh with relief. There will be enough left over for dinner as well. My day is saved. It is the perfect pretext to not put the clothes for wash or do any other work around the house. You see how easy it is? Blogging has immense benefits. It is the best excuse to get out of the day’s work. Try it and experience the results for yourselves.
Disclaimer: The author is not answerable to any untoward incidents that may happen or resultant damages thereof from trying out the suggestion prescribed above.
The prompt: “Write an excuse for not working today”