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I saw this video in a post by the Indian Homemaker titled, ‘Is stalking girls and women illegal in India‘. She is of the opinion that the video trivializes the issue of eve-teasing, a term which in itself is an objectionable one. You can read her blog which talks about much more than this and the interesting comments it has received, here. I agree with her about trivializing the issue. As if we needed any more flippancy than already exists! The term eve-teasing is a blatant trivialization of a serious problem faced by one half of the population for the sole reason of being born a female.
I don’t know what exactly prompted the people behind it to make this particular video. What was their intention?? Was it meant to be a hilarious look at an all-pervasive problem faced by girls/women in society?? Or did they mean to pass on a serious message to the public??
If the former had been the intention, then it is right on target. Those of us who watch the video, see a jobless young man following a pretty girl and bang his head against a lamp-post which he missed as his eyes were obviously busy elsewhere, feasting on a beautiful girl/girls.
Everyone laughs. It is a Tom and Jerry sort of moment. The girl could be Jerry the mouse and the boy, Tom the cat. When the Tom bangs his head Jerry the mouse and cronies laugh their hearts out and so do the watching kids or adults. Slap-stick comedy, intended to give you a moment’s fun, to be seen and forgotten.
But….
What if the makers meant to convey a serious message?? What if they meant to caution young boys and men not to eve-tease (that objectionable term again) or rather harass girls/women with their unwanted and objectionable attention?? If that had been the intention this video is an utter failure.
Why do I think so??
… because like I said earlier, this thoughtlessly made video trivializes the serious issue of harassment that girls/women face.
How??
Firstly, the injury happens because the post happened to be there. What if the post hadn’t been there?! Wouldn’t he then have gone on gawking at the girls without ‘injury’?? So eve-teasing is injurious to health only if a post comes in the way when you are gawking.
Secondly, he would have banged his head if he had been staring at a mo-bike, a building, even a crow that had suddenly shat on him. So our ‘eve-teasing’ buddies don’t face any more injury to their health it seems than any ordinary person who does not look where he/she is walking.
This is such a Bollywood-ish (regional films are no better) and stupid way of looking at things. Does anyone get a serious message via this ad?? Naah. Does it make you stop and think, examine your self?? Naah Naah and absolutely Naah. We all had our Tom and Jerry moment, including the lasses shown in the ad and are on our way to the next thing on our agenda. Perhaps for some the agenda is ‘let us go to that busy junction yaar, we might get an opportunity to rub against some girls/women.’ The video is long forgotten. How terribly sad.
Where is the message that should make you look into your heart and think?? Sadly missing because, the focus of the video is NOT on the message to be conveyed.
Why the hell is the emphasis (like everything else in a patriarchal society) on ‘injury’ to the boy in this video?? The message clearly is “you wanna avoid injury don’t stalk girls/women.’ BUT.. is that the point at all?? Is it, “Boys please avoid head injuries, don’t go trailing beautiful lasses with your mouth hanging open and bang your heads against unseen objects in your way.” Oh right, it is again about saving our boys/men. Right?? Warn them of the dangers tell them to save themselves few stitches and cuts. How about telling them to look (not literally, which they are doing anyway, but figuratively) ‘outside’ themselves and start thinking of others in the equation?? When will that happen??
How about thinking about the girls/women for a change?? After all isn’t it the female population that is injured by eve-teasing?? How come that never occurred to those directing a video to convey a message against harassment?? Who is the injured party in reality anyway?? Who do you want to save from injury?? Is anyone looking in the direction that matters at all?? Naaah. All are busy sending out messages on how the clowns can be saved from injuring themselves. Its all fun. Makes the girls laugh. Baat khatam.
Is that the way??
Shouldn’t the emphasis be on the right of every girl/woman to this world, its parks, its streets, its public places?? It belongs to her too. She is a human being just like the boy/man. She is as much entitled to this space on earth and to walk it free, without fear or harassment, as he. No, not because a man might bang his (stupid) head against a lamp-post or fall into a man-hole (though personally, I don’t have any objection to that happening to harassers in real life) or it is in any way potentially injurious to his health in other ways. What a ridiculous idea. This is about women and their rights, their entitled space and how that has to be respected by all.
Of course just as the saying ‘Charity begins at home’ goes, the lessons start at home. Those lessons that convey the message with permanence will be when it is taught and understood that women are people too just like men.
This video is a meaningless attempt to bring the attention on “eve teasing”. It makes things frivolous and focuss shifts from the wrong behaviour to the instant chancy punishment to the guy ogling at girls. The video lacks sensitivity ,which it should generate towards the girls and women who are victimised for no fault of theirs, that is , if this video was at all a serious attempt to bring to the notice ,the problem of victimising women on public places by unnecessary ,ugly attention .
@kirti,
Agree with all that you said. Making light of eve-teasing is what it is doing. Just a laughing matter. And ad, however funny itmight be, should touch a chord make a person think, OMG here is a point.
Good point to ponder over Shail. As a teenager, I’d been stalked very intensely. It was the worst experience I had and it kind of made me very conscious of my surroundings. I still have the trauma of that experience and don’t do well in big crowds and public places. It took away from my being my own person and I felt like a ‘thing’ of fancy than a flesh and blood human being with feelings. Like you said in that post where you hit that guy on the railway platform, I think more and more parents should ask their boys to keep their hands, eyes and filthy comments to themselves than to caution the daughters to keep themselves safe, and to not lift their heads or to go out wrapped in tarps to avoid attention.
Unfortunately the offenders are not just hormone raging teenagers – there are so many perverts – married men, old men and even people disguised as the ‘enlightened’ ones, teachers…it’s every where. Our society teaches the girl to keep quiet since raising a hue and cry would tarnish her name. I think there should be zero tolerance and every social being should work towards eradicating it.
I think a good place to start would be at home though….!
And about the video – it is a waste of time for the maker and the watcher – it doesn’t even attempt to scratch the surface.
@Laxmi,
I hate crowds for a similar reason. Imagine how free run given to half of the population by society has resulted in the other half growing up with trauma and fear! It has always been my contention that if the boys are brought up right, the girls can walk safely anywhere in the world. But the society and its elders spend ALL their goddamn efforts on controlling girls. What use?!! The situation only gets worse.
It is definitely not teenagers alone, all the rest of those you mention are in this. Society is too busy bringing up its females that it has n time to control these perverts. Only when the focus shifts from girls to both girls and boys can we expect some results I feel.
“After all isn’t it the female population that is injured by eve-teasing??…Who is the injured party in reality anyway?? Who do you want to save from injury?? Is anyone looking in the direction that matters at all?? Naaah. All are busy sending out messages on how the clowns can be saved from injuring themselves. Its all fun. Makes the girls laugh. Baat khatam.”
Absolutely Shail! You expressed it so well! Exactly what I was feeling. The video made sexual harassment into just silly thing boys tend to do. He fell down, so all is balanced, now the girls have nothing more to complain about.
@Indian Homemaker,
Skewed focus is my opinion about the video. Approach it from an angle which makes people see girls/women as humans. That would be more beneficial, I feel. Thank you IHM.
Even that thot stuck me – what if the post is not there at that place !!! Then he can be staring at the girls without any worry !!!
A very well thot post – written to the point that it smacks at the mind of ppl !!!
This is the way everything happens – male centric – no injury to men !!! Sad and ironic !!!
@UmaS,
I am glad you got the gist of what I wrote. Take a video, funnily or otherwise, but emphasize the right point: That we are all entitled to space. Fair, don’t you think??
I actually liked the Ad, because though (I agree with you) it is frivolous and bolly-woodish, THIS IS IN THE LANGUAGE OF THE MASSES. This is what people will easily understand. Only sensitive people will be impacted by a serious video. I don’t believe it will even REACH through, to roadside romeos. Its like an art film, you know, one that only critics will appreciate, but something that masses will not be interested in. This sort of frivolous ad, however, atleast will be watched, and probably even remembered by some folks!
@Pallavi,
I don’t mean a serious, art-type video should be taken to convey the message. How about a simple lesson to open their eyes on how girls/women are just like them and have rights to exist?? THAT is my point. And that point can very well be conveyed in slap-stick or whatever language of the masses as the case may be.
@Pallavi,
And Pal, Romeos are not found on roadsides alone, they come from homes. They are in every home. They are our fathers/uncles/husbands/brothers/sons.
I would agree with you and IHM, if this video was planned/staged and that boy and the girls were all invited to play their parts . It fails to convey the right message and has ended up in some “light entertainment” for the viewer and trivializes the issue.
At least a message should have appeared condemning the boy’s behaviour so that a useful message is sent to all, with a humourous sugar coating.
On the other hand, if this video is an impromptu, unplanned capture, then let us be a little more tolerant.
The person who caught this act on camera could not have known what is going to happen.
He/She just captured it and shared it. I started watching with concern and disgust but finally I felt happy and satisfied when he hit that lamp post and my first impulse was to feel “Serves him right”. I would not have felt like that if he had hit himself under different circumstances. I would have felt sorry and concerned. By his disgusting behaviour he had forfeited my sympathy.
Please don’t misunderstand me.
I share your disgust at this boy’s behaviour, no doubt about that.
I also support any move to educate young boys early in life so that this behaviour is prevented as far as possible, and punished severely if it happens in spite of being advised against it.
But I would not attack this video as insensitive.
If that were so, we should not be circulating this in our blogs.
Regards
GV
@G Vishwanath,
I am no expert on videos. But I am sure this one is not an impromptu one. Anyone with the know how can correct me if I am wrong.
Sometimes we do circulate something to show how bad it is. I feel the video is insensitive. If it were intended to be shown to nursery children to teach them girls aren’t to be harassed, yes, I might have grudgingly agreed that it is not insensitive. It does follow the Tom and Jerry pattern. But when it is meant for an adult audience…??!!
The purpose of my post is to say that unless harassers are made to understand (in slap-stick comedy or in any other way) the simple truth that men and women are people, humans and have equal right to spaces, nothing is really being achieved. Instead the problems of one half of the population is being treated flippantly as a joke by insensitive people.
@Shail,
If this was not an impromptu video capture, then it is a sad fact that the three young modern girls cooperated in making it.
I initially treated this rather lightly and simply enjoyed it when I first viewed it at IHM’s blog.
After reading your post and the comments, I have begun thinking over it more seriously.
Do you mind if I discuss this with others in another forum and also among Hindi bloggers to elicit opinions from a wider section of netizens?
I have access to a forum where there are several hundred senior citizens like me who might just love to chime in with an opinion.
For good measure I could also try to see what a wide circle of friends in the world of Hindi blogs, of all ages, of both sexes have to say on this. I have in mind two female Hindi bloggers to whom I plan to write and seek an opinion.
I would like to post a link to this video, give references to your blog and that of IHM and ask a direct question whether they feel this is an “insensitive” video that “trivialises the issue” and is not in good taste and whether the emphasis should have been on “the right of every girl/woman to this world, its parks, its streets, its public places?? ” without fear of being harassed or stalked.
I will compile any responses received and share it with you, and IHM and any body else interested.
Of course, if you feel I should not do this, I will let it rest.
Regards
GV
@G Vishwanath,
For the girls in the video, it is just another photo shoot that pays them. The real implications are beyond the scope of those acting in the video. But yes it is sad. I feel the same when I watch girls/women acting in ads that suport the idea the fairness is everything. I would want women as one to refuse to do such ads. But I suppose that’s just an idealistic dream 🙂
Please go ahead and find out from others what they think. It would be interesting to know. Perhaps they too might not have thought of this angle and might want to ponder on it. Or perhaps they might have a new angle. I am sure IHM also would love to know what others think.
@Shail,
I have just posted the following in a yahoo groups email discussion list which has mostly senior citizens like me as its members.
I have also posted this in another forum of ex students of a certain institution with a mix of members of various age groups and consist of both males and females.
I will translate this into Hindi tomorrow and send it to some Hindi blogger friends.
Let us see what opinions we get. I will share them with you after compiling the responses and may edit the names of the persons to protect their privacy.
Regards
GV
Questions from GV
I came across this video link on the subject of eve teasing in the blogs of two eminently readable lady bloggers whose posts I have been reading and enjoying recently.
This is short a video lasting just 53 seconds and will not take up much of your time.
While I had enjoyed watching this video, the lady bloggers who put up this video feel rather strongly about this and feel outraged at the “insensitivity” and “trivialising of the issue of eve teasing”.
I would greatly value your answers to these questions
1)Is this video in bad taste?
2)Is it insensitive?
3)Does it trivialize the issue of eve teasing
4)Should the emphasis have been on how boys should behave with girls?
I would like to compile your responses and share it with the lady bloggers in question
You can mail me privately if you would rather not go public with your opinions.
For those interested, the links to the blogs of these ladies are:
http://indianhomemaker.wordpress.com/2011/02/04/is-stalking-of-girls-and-women-illegal-in-india/
https://shailsnest.com/wp/rant/injurious-to-whose-health/
Regards
GV
@G Vishwanath,
That sounds good.
@shail,
This is what I wrote to two active lady bloggers who write in Hindi and are outspoken on issues like these.
Regards
GV
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दिव्याजी/रचनाजी,
कृपया इस कडी पर जाकर यह विडियो देखिए।
यह eve teasing से सम्बन्धित है।
यह विडियो मैंने अंग्रेज़ी में लिखती हुईं दो महिला ब्लॉग्गरों के यहाँ देखा था।
५३ सेकंड का विडियो है और ज्यादा समय नहीं लगता इसे देखेने में।
मुझे तो देखकर बडा मजा आया था पर ये दोनों महिला ब्लॉग्गर इस विडियो से नाराज हैं
उन्होंने इसे असंवेदनशील कहा और यह भी राय दी कि यह मामले को महत्वहीन बना देता है
ईव टीसिंग, जो एक गंभीर मामला है, उसे हलका फ़ुलका मजाक बना कर मनोरंजन के लिए पेश किया गया है।
लडकों को कैसा बरताव करना चाहिए, यह सन्देश यहाँ बिल्कुल नहीं मिलता।
यदि आपको उपयुक्त लगे तो कृपया इसे अपने ब्लॉग पर छापकर आपके पाठकों की राय माँगिए।
हम आपकी और पाठकों की राय का संकलन करके इन महिला ब्लॉग्गरों को भेजना चाहते हैं
यदि रुचि हो तो इन महिला ब्लॉग्गरों की कडियाँ दे रहा हूँ।
http://indianhomemaker.wordpress.com/2011/02/04/is-stalking-of-girls-and-women-illegal-in-india/
https://shailsnest.com/wp/rant/injurious-to-whose-health/
शुभकामनाएं
जी विश्वनाथ