I woke up to a beautiful morning today. There was a nip in the air. Once I was done with preparing breakfast I walked out to the front yard and looked up at the sky. The clouds looked like fluffy cotton wool against the beautiful blue sky. I decided to get my camera and take some pictures. You wanna come?? I asked the dog. She did not give me a reply. She did not even look up at me. Ok, have it your way, I said. I walked up the stairs and was soon clicking away. The bare branches of the Kani konna (cassia fistula) tree looked a promising subject set against the sky and clouds.

A couple of clicks and I was looking around for more subjects. I homed in on the leaves of the tree (of whose name I am ignorant) in the front yard and clicked some more.

Enough, I decided, time to go down and get on with the days work. As I turned I found someone sitting majestically like a matriarch keeping a protective eye on the littlest of her wards. Her little pink tongue was out and her ears in their watchful mode. The dog, who had acted pricey when I had invited her to accompany me, had quietly come up the stairs and was now sitting at some distance taking in all that was happening with a proprietary air. She probably wanted to keep an eye on me and make sure I did not get into any mischief while her Master was away.

On seeing her and the regal posture for the tiny dog she is, I burst out laughing, my habit at most things she does. I don’t think that she likes it. I mean to be fair, who would when someone starts cackling like that at whatever you do??! She didn’t blink an eye though, just looked away even more majestically, giving the royal cold shoulder. I readied my camera. This majestic look, I had to document. But even as I clicked, the stupid dog that she is (which is why I call her Stupidity), she got up, in a hurry to leave.

I mean what is it with her?? Who does she think she is that she has to run off each time I ready the camera. Most times I end up clicking her rump. Was she really camera shy or offended that I had laughed at her?? Anyway, I missed getting a picture of her impersonating a matriarch and had to be content with one of her getting up to leave.

You bet I was pissed off. I ran after her, but not too fast as to go tumbling down the stairs and end up like Humpty Dumpty who I hear couldn’t be put together again. I found her eventually, sitting on the steps. I aimed the camera. I was set on taking her picture, whether she liked it or not. You are not going to believe this, the dog got up again all ready to run. Oh no you don’t doggie!! I held her down firmly with one hand and clicked with the other. It is not the same, but then I wanted her to know who the boss is hereabouts.

Oh ahh well sigh. It is no fun these days with a sleepy old dog. I miss the good old days when my whole day revolved around needling her and making her run behind non-existent cats by whispering ‘poocha poocha’ and pointing outside (which guaranteed a barking show for the next 10-15 minutes) and also crows by going ‘kaakka’ (getting another 10-15 minutes worth of entertainment). I could also point to the roof and say ‘Olli olli’ to have her run from room to room to try and catch the lizard sitting high up on the wall. If I went ‘Eeeek eeeeek’ in my shrillest voice she came running to rescue me from a mouse which I pretended had got away making her search frantically for it. Tempting her to rush to the kitchen only needed mention of a carrot.

Sigh, all the good old days seem over. When I call her now, she just doesn’t come. I know she is old and can’t come bounding like she used to. But she does not even look up. Is she genuinely deaf or pretending to be to avoid the running around I make her do for a few laughs?? Hmmm…. The vet smiled at me when I asked him. Drop something next to her and see what she does, he said. I took a steel plate walked to her and dropped it right next to her. The noise made me jump out of my own skin, but she herself turned to her left as if she might have heard something. I could hear the Lord and Master guffawing from the next room, having understood why I was hurling plates.

“She did not even turn a hair!” I wailed.

“She probably thought you had dropped a plastic spoon!” he said guffawing louder.

*Sob sob sob*

I tell you, this house is too quiet with her sleeping 24X7 or almost. I do enjoy the quiet and all, but earlier I could talk to her whenever I wanted to. My share of most of the 30000 words (a woman needs to speak 30000 words a day, I am told by reliable sources) was expended on her. But now the 30000 words don’t have an outlet and are left pushing and shoving and bubbling inside me. It is no fun.

I mean I am all ready to talk to her as before. But what fun is it when she won’t listen to me, won’t tilt her head in that cute way of hers in reply?? Do you think I can get my dog a hearing aid??