In our, what everyone and their great grand uncle now call ‘the good old days’, it was common for parents to say ‘get out of my house’ to their children at the least provocation. It was never based on a fair evaluation of circumstances. Not that a fair evaluation can ever justify parents asking children to leave the house, definitely not underage children.

Anyway…

What was sad was that this retort was used as a way of putting an end to an ongoing argument, or as a show of intense displeasure at the children for having done something that went against their diktat, depended solely on the parents’ mood, their level of stress and/or frustration at whatever was happening in their life at that moment.

Nothing could be more unfair on unjust to a child than this. But then who gave any thought to children or their mental well being in those days? I doubt even a handful did. As long as food and shelter were provided the parents’ duty was supposedly done and children had to be grateful to them till their dying day. The beatings and harsh words they had been subjected to while growing up were to be conveniently forgotten because it was all for ‘your own good’ and ‘because you were bad’ and ‘we were trying to make you a better person’.

Like heck!

Imagine parents telling a helpless child, even a teen, to get out of the house, the only refuge they have known since birth, for whatever reason instead of trying to solve the issues. It was usually the fathers who did this the most, head of the household and all that nonsense, and especially with sons, but mothers were equally bad with daughters being at the receiving end. I should know, I am someone who has had to hear this quite a few times.

One day, when I had had enough of being asked to ‘get out of the house’ as the final say in yet another argument with mother, I had my answer ready: “What do you mean ‘get out of the house’?” I asked her. “You brought me into the world and you have the duty to see I can stand on my own feet. You do your duty first before asking me to leave. Until then this is MY house as much as it is yours and I am NOT going anywhere!” Never once did I have to listen to this nonsense again.

I have called this out as bullsh*t then, and I do so now. Seeing posts from those of my generation praising these ways of yore, and stating, “Look at us! What’s wrong with us? We grew up to be wholesome persons in spite!” makes me want to throw up. Wholesome persons, my foot. What’s wrong with us, my other foot! They cannot even see what it has done to them, all of us in genera. How much sadder can it get?

Now about the ‘Go to (wherever)’.

There are a set of people in our country right now who think that whoever questions the present government needs to ‘go to’ our neighbouring country (the wherever). WHY? and HOW? Just WHO do these people think they are? Sole owners of this country or what? Hello! This is our country too. We were born here, remember? Just like you. What gives ANYONE the right to order others to ‘go to (wherever)’ even if they question a government or a leader?

Methinks that this is an extension of the same attitude of ‘get out of my house’ working behind this attitude of ‘go to (wherever)’. Both want others to leave their presence/life or else tow their line absolutely. No thought about the others’ rights which are the same as theirs! This country belongs to all of us equally. When will we understand we cannot push anyone out of a place which rightfully belongs to them? When will sanity prevail?

©️ Shail Mohan 2024