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What it’s all about: Five Sentence Fiction is about packing a powerful punch in a tiny fist. Each week Lillie McFerrin posts a one word inspiration, then anyone wishing to participate can write a five sentence story based on the prompt word. The word does not have to appear in the five sentences, and is just for direction. This week: IRRITATION.
And whaddya know, I have two of them today 😉
1.
His irritation at some lapse on her part was obvious in the way his brows were deeply furrowed..
She started hyperventilating wondering what she had got wrong this time.
The very next moment he sent the laden plate flying with one angry swipe of his hand.
The food was splattered all over her and the floor.
That’s when she realised she had forgotten the customary glass of water when she set the table for dinner.
2.
She looked through the clothes inside her wardrobe, chose a few, but flung them all away from her in irritation.
She wanted something that no one had seen her wear before, something spanking new and different too that made her stand out at the party the next day.
Suddenly she hit upon the perfect idea, after all she had the skill, although acquired reluctantly at the insistence of her mother.
That evening when her mother got home, the daughter was busy putting the final touches to the newly stitched dress.
The mother’s proud smile of approval faltered and almost disappeared when she saw bits and pieces of her much loved sari littering the floor.
©Shail Mohan 2014
Shail's Nest 
Liked the first one…the second one was like holding a mirror! 🙂
Aha! 😀
Thank you 🙂
How completely inconsiderate of both of them in both stories!
Loved them both..
The first was a bit scary because it mirrors abuse and the second was just sad because the daughter was totally oblivious of her mother’s love for her saree…
True. You can say the second was rather ‘blissfully’ selfish 😉
Both very well done. The second one made me giggle, I could relate. Excellent.
I bet the mother had mixed feelings though 😉
Nice stories – the first one had some real power to it, you can see the history of abuse in the reaction, the hyperventilating etc.
Well done.
KT
Thank you for the feedback. I really appreciate that. 🙂
First one is a grim reality in many homes. Makes me want to slap the guy. Lol@the second one 😀 me likey
Thanks, Indy 🙂
the 1st one was irritating and abusive too and the 2nd one was as you said, ‘blissfully selfish’! 😛
Yeah, in her own world (the 2nd one) 🙂
Oh no…I will never serve food to such ppl…insensitive and rude and no respect for food and women….Shail, you made me so irritated with that story – the power of words, I tell you !
Second one…she could’ve at least asked her mom !!!
Agree with you on both counts.
Th first one shoes the domestic violence that is very common and the second, a typical spoiled teen! nice! loved both 🙂
Thank you, and welcome to Shail’s Nest 🙂
Great to read two stories that pack a punch! 🙂
Fiery temper & selfish motive… wife & mother are at receiving end respectively…
Thanks, Anita for the comment and welcome to Shail’s Nest 🙂
Oh dear! The mom in the second one could be me a few years from now. My daughter is always experimenting and parading with my dupattas! 😀
Uh-ho! Best of luck 😀 😀
Love both of them!
The first one talks so much about what women go through, of how they are treated, even now after so many years of oppression… the second one would be me but I don’t have a clue about stitching so would probably have to go begging my Ma to stitch a dress for me 😛
Thank you Story Teller 🙂 I used to do lots of tailoring for myself and kids when my eyes were better (but I swear I have never ever done that to my mother’s sari) 😉
Haha 😀 that way my Ma always manages to take claim over dress materials that I buy for myself and i let her do it cause neither am i too fond of them and who can say no to ma!? 😀
on a completely different note, you look beautiful! 🙂 ❤
Awww, thank you! blushes
Great write up,
I had just my moment of irritation and annoyance recently, especially when it comes to dealing with a typical Indian (or maybe just mallus do this?) arrogant/chauvinistic mindset where they cannot perceive or refuse to acknoweledge how things are different now and still live in their time warp while lambasting how they are the best and nothing goes wrong and every other society is ‘bad-in addition how everyone should live in Kerala and be like the typical malayalee and follow their culture (what’s wrong in being different and respecting those differences?). Anyway, found this just in time since this experience happened recently and had to share.
I think we Indians specialise in this attitude of ‘everything other than our own culture/tradition is bad’ attitude. I simply hate it.
Loved both of these! Your mind is so, so creative – jealous, much!
I am lapping up that compliment. Thanks mucho! 🙂