Tags
gender bias, inequality, rant, sarcasm, sexual harassment, women
Oh to be born in the land of the Maha-abuse (updated to add this link: Maha Abuse of Woman in Mahabharata), where Duryodhan set the example for those to follow and the followers in modern times are ever ready to take his lessons to new heights (and lows), living with dignity, as a human is a really tough proposition for girls and women.
In Duryodhan’s case, it was all within the family so to speak. He attempted to disrobe his sister in law (to tell you the truth, I don’t know if he did that to anyone else), the much acclaimed Draupadi, while her five husbands and all the pompous elders (much like those of the present) sat around twiddling their thumbs citing rules and regulations as their excuse for doing so. Draupadi had only herself to depend upon for her own defence. And when that failed, divine intervention is supposed to have came to her rescue.
Hmm… I wonder if that tells us something in the present, something like only Gods can save you from hooligans, which translates to no one can actually help you. You see, Draupadi was lucky. She lived in times when Gods supposedly roamed the Earth, when Lord Krishna could work his magic and save her from her tormentors. We don’t have Gods of that calibre in modern times who will rush to the defence of women however heartbreakingly they may cry. Not that we women actually want Gods to rush to our rescue. What we want is to be left alone to lead a life where we don’t have the need to call upon Gods to come to our rescue. I am sure if Draupadi were here, she’d agree to that unequivocally. All we women want is to be treated like humans, which we are by the way. But that it seems. has been and is a pretty tough proposition.
A class XI student was attacked by a mob in Guwahati. According to known facts, she was returning from a party. A mob beat her up and stripped her. No one heard her cries for help. What did I tell you? Women live in harsh times now. Without Krishna around, Kauravas have multiplied manifold. They roam the streets unchecked, especially so on days like New Year’s eve when they can easily find an excuse for their behaviour on high spirits and also being on spirits. It seems in those conditions they have the liberty to lay hands on sisters, mothers, and daughters of other Kauravas with impunity. All they have to do is imagine that they are mothers, sisters and daughters of Pandavas, their enemies. That excuses everything they do in their cramped upper storeys that go by the name of brains.
It took half an hour for the police to reach to rescue the girl from the mob of molesters. The descendents of Duryodhan are everywhere, in the field of politics, medicine, police, bureaucracy, teaching, panchayats. Ahhh… let me tell you of this particular panchayat an hour from Delhi, that has distinguished itself by taking a decision that “love marriages and unescorted walks in the evenings are off-limits for women.” Hmmm.. I feel the time is not far off when they will put collars on the necks of women and take them out for walks on a leash. Can’t have the bitches roaming the streets freely any time of the day, can they?
I must say, the “compassionate” lot in the panchayat have relaxed the rule for those above 40 years of age. Oh no no, they definitely cannot fall in love. That’s such an un-Indian concept and unheard of (goes to show just how much Indians know of their own culture and background that they supposedly so cherish and wish to uphold). The above 40s are allowed to walk un-escorted in the evenings. Thank God for small mercies. But tell me, who in their right minds would want to go for unescorted evening walks, even at a doddering eighty, in a village full of sex-crazed males? As per a villager named Musharraf, “If single girls walk in the village a lot problems are created.” One shudders to think what happens if they (single girls) run. Will they be chased by the maniacs of the village like a bike chased by neigborhood strays?
So you see how it is. Even at the grass-root level the country is infected with ‘potentised’ Kaurava descendents. It could have been no different on the streets of Guwahati that day as the mob mauled the lone girl. Someone was quite resourceful in filming the molestation and uploading it on youtube which was quickly picked up by the channels. What made him do it, the thrill or the desire to help? One is left wondering. Yet some others stood around, much resembling the elders of the Kuru clan all those long years ago when Duryodhan and co went into their molestation act, except that this time the spectators got to see some action unlike the disappointed crowd in the court.
So now comes the logical next step of blaming the victim. Let’s start on those oh-so-predictable lines: the girl was returning from a party, probably wearing a revealing dress, she was drunk, out after dark, she had loose morals, blah blah and more such useless blah. Excellent reasons for Indian mobs to attack directly and society to do so indirectly, right? In millions of homes this news will have been broadcasted to, the response would be the same. The girl is to blame. (A handful of us who think otherwise don’t actually count). That my dears is what our famed culture has instilled in those of its adherents and descendents: trash the victim.
Shame on us who pride ourselves on our ancient culture, whose superiority we do not fail to mention at the drop of a hat. Quit talking and preening about a culture that has not taught us to treat women as humans, that encourages and glorifies keeping women as chattel, that looks for its fulfilment of manhood in mauling women on streets, beating them behind closed doors or even on streets, raping them and considering them inferior. Don’t ever talk to me about a culture that worships women as a stone deity in the sanctum sanctorum of a temple. We bloody don’t want your goddamn worship because that’s not where we live, in a sanctified temple. We live among you, in the real and harsh world, within the society. Just allow us to ‘live’ too.
Updated to add:
Read these posts from The Indian Homemaker, and see for yourself some of the Faces of Cowardice of India here:
This is what rapists do when there is no fear of punishment.
Agnija Bharathi said:
“We bloody don’t want your goddamn worship because that’s not where we live, in a sanctified temple” When will they hear this?
shail said:
They are stone deaf or else how can they miss the deafening roar?! 😦
pixie said:
its sad.. horrific and very scary!
Extremely inhuman… how could anyone do that?! 😦 😦
shail said:
They had to boost their egos by attacking a lone girl in a pack. Must be such cowards.
R's Mom said:
Gosh! I read about it at IHM’s blog..its sad, its horrific and it just makes me shudder that I am bringing my child in such an enviornment 😦
shail said:
I don’t wonder you shudder. I do, each time I hear someone is planning to have a child. Honestly speaking I want to ask them, “What the hell are you thinking bringing a child into this horrible world?” 😦
Amit said:
Shail, sometimes I wonder if it will be better to leave this country and go somewhere peaceful. I don’t think my heart will be able to take this high blood pressure for long.
And yes, the modern day Krishna will be a gun or a knife, I guess. 1 molester less will be a huge burden off mother India.
shail said:
Sometimes I wonder too. One story after another. i can’t forget the smirk on the face of the guy in red. 😦
ashreyamom said:
yes, we are not a period where gods walk on road, but just devils everywhere.. it is so sad.. i remeber reading in IHM blog, where someone commenting, they have not faced eve-teasing in eastern part of India.. but where ever you walk on this world, women face such problems.. hope krishna re-incarnates himself again.
yada yada hi dharmasya
glanir bhavati bharata
abhyutthanam adharmasya
tadatmanam srjamy aham
waiting for u krishna/krish..
shail said:
If society treated crimes against women as ‘crimes’ we wouldn’t need any Gods to come to the rescue of women. Already I am getting stupid comments from morons as to what the girl was doing in a bar.
Ash said:
Oh, the horrible things people do in the name of “Indian Culture”… these two meaningless words have begun to irritate the heck out of me each time I see them written or hear them spoken.
shail said:
And it raises your hackles coming from culture-less boors. 😦
Indian Homemaker said:
DGP, Assam, Jayanta Choudhury is trying to explain how it started.. but no explanation for why only four arrests have been made, and that too when the video went viral online. Only eleven have been identified as yet.
shail said:
Yeah and also how the red tee wala got away? Wonder what explanation they have for that.
phoenixritu said:
Shail, all the empathy and shock for Draupadi was just because she was of royal blood. Routine rape and thrashing was the lot of women who were not royal. You think Bhishma and the lot would have spared any sympathy for a slave girl? Women don’t matter, women of birth do – and that too only because their male “protectors” could retaliate and pretty brutally at that.
shail said:
Not even a woman of birth was treated right on her own merit. So, yeah you are right, can we expect a slave girl to be treated any better?
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Ms Anonymous said:
When Draupadi, with all her royal blood could be married off to 5 brothers, pawned off to the Kauravas, disrobed in front of the entire sasural and maikewale, no effort by anyone to stop the crime……all this because the ‘jaban was more important than a woman’s ‘ijjat’. But the same ‘ijjat’ becomes important when the girl decides to live life on her own terms. It was no different then.
In the present day scenario a woman is molested in public, with no one batting an eyelid, like the Kauravas and Pandavas, playing spectators.
Aren’t Indians a mentally impotent lot!
shail said:
Welcome to Shail’s Nest Ms Anonymous. Mentally impotent describes it well. That is why I have people trying to heckle me into arguments on why the girl was at the bar as if that is the issue here, not the shameless behavior of the brutes.
Nidaa said:
I jus cant get rid of the thought that ‘it cud hav been me’. Im shaking with useless rage, tears, helplessness n hopelessness. Women have are and will always be treated like shit… We’re deluding ourselves wen we hope for change… Nothng is going to change! Sexual abuse is unfortunately a national sport now (& before too)…
shail said:
Welcome to Shail’s Nest Nidaa. Yes it could have been any of us. Women ARE treated like shit while people go around talking of the greatness of this culture that worships women. Such useless bs, worshiping women as stone idols and then pawing and groping her in public.
I agree, and I am sure most all women will agree too, that sexual abuse is our national sport.
vishvanaathjee said:
Too shocked for words.
Don’t know what to say.
GV
shail said:
Mind-numbing 😦
Sumana said:
I want to burn my passport…even words like enraged, livid, boiling blood cannot describe what I feel about this incident.
shail said:
I know, I felt like denouncing and fleeing this place.
Shilpa said:
About that panchayat diktat, how are they going to ascertain the woman’s age? Is she supposed to carry her birth certificate each time she steps out of the house?
shail said:
May be the Panchayat is going to appoint itself to look women up and down to ascertain their age. That gives everyone a valid reason to ogle.
Aa's Mom said:
This is just so disgusting. I feel all parents should train their girls from an early age in martial arts so that they can defend themselves, because, obviously, no one else will help them!! God help us if this is the acceptable behavior now!!
shail said:
… but first train their sons to be respectful of other’s privacy.
We are hearing more and more of such harassment. It is such a shame.
Jay said:
This is my first time here, Shail. You have echoed my thoughts! It’s not much about raising girls to be ‘good’, but boys well!
shail said:
I asked my mother once and many more people since: You have been teaching girls. But what good will come of it when you don’t teach boys anything? If a job requires two hands and only one out of the two is trained to do it, how will it ever get done?
BTW, welcome to Shail’s Nest. 🙂
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samshaik said:
you elucidated a problem which most are aware of. suggestions at improving the conditions will be more effective.
shail said:
Perhaps it would. But there are the more qualified ones already doing that. This post does not claim to or was meant to create awareness.
Btw, welcome to Shail’s Nest
samshaik said:
my pleasure. safe to say then you were perhaps venting ?
btw, I am curious as to what such a young girl was doing in a bar ?
shail said:
If your intention is to provoke and drag me into unrelated and unnecessary discussions, you have come to the wrong place.
Satish said:
She was doing pretty much the same thing young men were doing in the bar….except, of course, molesting and terrorizing defenseless girls. Good to know that your sympathies seem to lie with the molesters…
Leanna said:
Awesome reply! I wish there were more sensible men like you in our country. I’m so sick of the “what what she doing/drinking/wearing/eating/saying” crap!!
shail said:
Thanks Satish, That is a fitting reply.
A said:
She was doing exactly what she wanted to do, in a free country. You, or anyone else, have no right to ‘moralize’ in the name of warped ‘Indian culture’… What others do is nobody’s business.
Oh, yeah…. The molesters (who, by the way, are perverts and criminals and will languish in jail for what they’ve done) apparently thought the same thing you’ve said here: “What is she doing in a bar, she has no business being there”.
sos said:
Reblogged this on Boiling Wok.
shail said:
Thank you 🙂
Indian Homemaker said:
I heard one panelist on NDTV/Times Now say that the reason why police often questions a rape vicitm’s life style is because they are trying to defend the likes of themselves. When you consider some of their actions and words, it does seem to make sense.
I guess some Phuddu men (In the words of Amit of Mashed Musing) might resent women enjoying driving, earning, drinking, eating out, spending, saving, having relationships, traveling, being independent etc.
Women avoid reporting sexual assaults because they fear being accused of not wearing, eating, drinking, laughing, talking, walking etc according to the ways random rapists approve of. What they should wear is particularly complicated, no salwar is Andhra, no jeans in Kanpur University, no shorts in some Bombay colleges, no ‘nanga sar’ in Baghpat.
Instead of all this ignorant tripe – all we need is a strong message to the rapists/molesters, that no matter what – if they committed the crime, they would go to jail.
shail said:
Your last lines sums it up with clarity, IHM. Commit a crime, be punished. That’s all we need.
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ittakestime said:
This is such a fitting reply , to people who keep on boasting about the so called “Indian Culture” !! Well said .
shail said:
Thank you. I am actually sick and tired about the so-called Indian Culture. You only hear the blowing of trumpets and nothing to show for it.
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Rinzu Rajan said:
The law on paper in India has allowed even a sex worker to say a no to such kinda ill treatment.! That is if she wants she can sleep wit ha potential customer else she can’t be forced.! i am snot demeaning sex workers here but this is the law of the land on paper.! Hardly in deeds no one knows of them and no one is bothered to know of them.! Liked the age old Mahabharata comparison.!