Shail’s Nest

I was caught in the web I know
Love claimed me for its own I know
I made a mistake I know
You are that mistake I know

I gave you my heart I know
Though I shouldn’t have I know
I was helpless I know
It was Destiny I know

We will never be one I know
Not in this life [...]

I dug holes in the backyard
buried tiny chunks of me
and
over them planted shrubs
for you to see
Some parts are now missing
I am not whole
but
you would never know
of the hollow
for
the green leaves
the pretty flowers
will hold you in their spell
while I weep…

- Shail Mohan (Jan 2010)

I imagined
I was of flesh and blood
with a heart and a brain
feelings and pain
I bled when nicked
Too close the fire singed
invisible arrows pierced
and my eyes shed tears.
I forgot… I am but inanimate
Just a mirror on the wall
Metal and glass
No feelings at all
People glance
To make up their face
A smile, a grimace
then onward on their ways…
You [...]

When we met
and knew in an instant
we were meant to be…
when nothing mattered
not the chains that fettered
or the ropes that bound…
when music was
your whispered words
and its rhythm your heartbeat
when it rained nothing but love
washing away eons of loneliness
and the circle of your arms
became the universe
the happiest days of my life
had [...]

Do you miss me as much as I miss you??
When you are away I feel so blue
Blue is the color of the sky
And also the endless sea that stretches between you and I.
- Shail Mohan (2008)

Last night I dreamt
we sprouted wings
flew around the Moon towards Neptune
in our little shack on the ‘ice giant’
I brewed pots of tea
we sipped watching the moons….
In the pale light, your eyes
kindled embers to a roaring flame
and I was no longer the ice maiden.

- Shail Mohan (July 2009)

There once was a man who had a little of Everything
But a whole lot of Nothing
And yet he gave freely of his Everything
To himself keeping just Nothing
Then one lucky day he got not little, but all of Everything
He realized soon the difference, Nothing was but Nothing
Everything was after all Everything
He made up his mind to [...]

I have in me
Invisible switches
There is one for less
Another for more
Others are for degrees of less
And the rest for grades of more
Some need very less
Some even more
And at times a little less
At other times a great deal more
When I give less
You crave for more
When you need only less
I offer you a lot more
How little [...]

A spark that flares
and spreads
uncontainable
irreversible
burning yesterdays
erasing forever
the shell of memories
the cocoon of  comfort
freeing todays
to long for the unknown
dream with abandon
of uncertain tomorrows
shrouded in mists
that never show
what they truly hold.

- Shail Mohan (Aug 2007)

Reposted from shail-mohsn blogs @sulekha.com

I lay down my arms
The battle is lost
My allies are gone
I am left all alone
Hope was butchered
Spontaneity maimed
Dreams taken prisoners
Optimism retired hurt
A wry laughter rings
Pessimism sings
You win I lose
No need for coups
All that was mine
Is now yours
Why leave them behind
Take also these tears…

-Shail Mohan (June 2009)
Reposted from shail-mohan blogs @sulekha.com